Damn that Ghetto Booty

My friends at work started teasing me ever since I started dating Jeff that, now that I "have" a man, I can stop worrying about being "thin". First off, I'm far from "thin", and clothes can hide a great multitude of fright, and secondly, I'd like to "keep" Jeff interested.

The winter months are pretty hard to keep the pounds off. Because of the cold, I can't walk as much on campus, it's harder to work out in the garage, and walking outside is often times impossible or not worth it. Lack of sunlight also decreases motivation, and increases a person's appetite, making it much harder to stick to a balanced diet without diverting one's attention to comfort foods. I have indeed noticed an increase in my mid section, and I'm annoyed to say the least. I actually had to go up a notch on my belt.. thankfully it is only one notch, but still it's one notch in the wrong direction. The fat has to go!

Dad and Joey assembled the elliptical machine the other day, though because of being under the weather, I was too weak to try it out. Dad went on it for two minutes and was winded, which peaked my curiosity. I decided to give it a try today, and thought I was going to have a heart attack after 5 minutes. I literally had to get off the damn machine.

It's a rather awkward style of exercise, like riding a bike while standing. I almost feel as if I'm trying to keep myself standing, and my butt instinctively wants to be sitting, as if riding a bike. After ditching the machine from Hell, I wandered off to watch an episode of Friends, while munching on a bowl of Doritos. After consuming the chips, my mind focused its attention on my pot belly and ghetto booty. I decided to give the elliptical another shot.

I altered my motion on the machine, swaying side to side a bit, almost like skiing, to try and compensate for the odd new type of motion. It seemed to help, as long as I remembered to move like I was skiing, versus just going for a walk. While it made keeping vertical a little easier, I still "felt" the burn in my legs and thighs (which is a good thing!), and my heart rate certainly increased quickly. This too can be seen as a positive thing, since you burn calories when your heart rate increases, and it took me at least 20 minutes on the treadmill to get my heart pumping faster than normal. This time I managed to last 10 minutes before admitting defeat.

I suppose it is something I just have to get used to. After all, when I first bought a bike about two years ago, I was winded just going around the block. After a while of getting used to the exercise, I am now able to go miles. I'm hoping the same thing will apply here.

"Dear God.. If I can't be thin, please make my friends fat!"