As my good friend Renita would say "Why you all up in my Kool-aide when you don't even know the flavor?"
I was talking with Jason today and it both hit us how much gay people talk about each other. The references we give when a name is mentioned is incredible.. because usually they aren't good ones. Oddly enough, they usually aren't even first hand information "Well I heard from so and so that he's got serious issues." Well that's nice.. don't we all. Seems we have no problem talking about people we either don't know, or don't know well. There in lies the ties that make up the gay "community".
Oh, I fully admit, I'm just as bad as the next homo when it comes to this... and I have yet to meet ANYONE who can do otherwise. Maybe we all do it, but perhaps it's the degree to which we do it that makes the difference, I just don't know.
I met a guy from online yesterday, and we had a good time together. Seems really nice, we have a lot in common, etc. Odd though how when I have mentioned his name to some people, I get an odd look, or the stories start of "What they've heard". Am I jaded? Yes. Bitter? Oh hell yea.. but when asked for references about my ex's (and oddly enough, I have been), I am learning to say "the best thing you can do is find out for yourself". After all, when I first started going with Jeff, I got an ear full on him... and when I confronted him about it he asked me to let HIM show me the type of man he is... which he did. LOL People behave differently around different people... something I just need to keep in mind.
I can only imagine what people say when my name is mentioned... Oh, to be a fly on the wall sometimes. Ha Ha Ha!