Sacred Triduum and Easter Sunday

I was hoping to blog each day of the Sacred Triduum (Holy Thursday, Good Friday and Holy Saturday) explaining the complex traditions and observances of the days -- in my characteristic Catholic-History-Geek way, but as has been the case lately.. time seemed to escape me.  So I'll make up for it now! (in an abbreviated version anyway) :-P

Holy Week (Palm Sunday through Holy Saturday) has always been a time of great spiritual renewal for me.  I love our rich traditions and observances.  Sadly though, working in retail I don't often get to fully participate in the liturgical celebrations.

Holy Thursday is the time when Catholics celebrate Christ's instituting of the Mass and the Eucharist -- done at the Last Supper.  After the Mass, the altar is stripped bare in preparation for the solemn remembrance of the passion of Christ on Good Friday.  The blessed sacrament is removed from the main tabernacle and placed in a side chapel adorned with flowers and candles where the faithful can stay and pray before our Lord present in the sacrament for the remainder of the night.

I had to miss the Mass, but stopped in for prayer and meditation after work.  It's nice to be there when the Church has quieted down, and there are only a few of us there - coming and going all night - to visit the blessed sacrament.  I always think of Christ's admonishment to His apostles who fell asleep during his agony in the garden: "Could you not stay awake for one hour?"  -- I often hear Him saying: "could you not visit me for one moment?"

This Liturgy also includes the washing of the feet of 12 men.. in imitation of Christ washing the feet of his 12 apostles before the Last Supper.  This part always made me uncomfortable and I was always glad I was not one who had to have his feet washed.  I could totally sympathize with Peter who felt embarrassed to have Christ wash his feet.  It is a good practice in humility though.. both for the priest and those whose feet he is washing. For the rest of us, it is also a public reminder of the humility we should all strive for as well as the charity we should show to one another.

Good Friday is the day we remember Christ's passion and death on the cross.  Traditionally, the priest wore black - the traditional color of mourning.  Symbolic of the sadness of Christ in His suffering and His brutal death upon the cross.  Sadly, in an effort to be a bit more acceptable to "modern tastes", the Church has since adopted the use of red - which they claim is not symbolic of blood, but the symbol of royalty.. for Christ the King.  I always thought the color for royalty was purple.. but I digress. 

In this Liturgy (there is no Mass or consecration on Good Friday), the priest holds up the crucifix exclaiming: "This is the wood of the cross, on which has hung the savior of the world".  Kneeling, we respond: "Come let us adore!"  After the cross processes through the Church, the faithful then have the opportunity to come up and venerate the cross - symbol of Christ's suffering - by kissing the cross.  



It is always humbling and moving to be attending the Good Friday Liturgy or meditating on the Stations of the Cross at 3pm - which is said to be the hour when Christ died.  It's just such an awe inspiring moment to think of everything that happened at that moment in history.  If you read the account in the Gospels: the sky growing dark, the earthquakes, the veil in the temple ripping in two.  I can't imagine what it must have felt like to see and experience all of that!


Sadly, I did not make it to the Easter Vigil on Holy Saturday.  This Mass is not for those who only go to Mass out of guilt and want to "get it over with" as quickly as possible.  I love the richness of this Liturgy - though I rarely get to attend it any more.  It begins with the blessing of the Easter fire - symbol that Christ is the light of the world - the light in the darkness of our sinfulness.  The priest blesses the paschal candle (that big candle used at baptisms).. and lights the candle from the newly lit Easter fire.

The Easter Water... symbol of our Baptism and washing away of sins - is also blessed, and the holy water fonts of the Church are again filled after having been empty since Holy Thursday (or Palm Sunday). 

Easter Sunday is the culmination of all the anticipation of the season of Lent... our penance and waiting is now over and it is time to rejoice!  I love how the Churches are decorated.. and the wonderful scent of Easter flowers fill the air.  Everyone was in their Easter best... one thing I love about my parish.. people still dress to go to Mass!

Going to the "older" traditional form of the Mass, our celebration begins with the singing of the "Vidi Aquam" - "I saw water coming forth from the temple
on the right side, alleluia:
and all those to whom this water came
were saved, and shall say, alleluia, alleluia." (of course we chant it in Latin).

For me, hearing this and seeing the priest bless the congregation with the Easter water from last night's vigil is the official start of Easter!!  Reminder that we have been washed clean by the sacrifice of Christ.

After Mass I headed over to my Aunt Joan's house to have brunch with my Dad's side of the family.  I swear someone in our family needs to move into a hall or something because we always manage to cram a big group of people into the smallest houses! haha! 

My Aunt Joan always puts out a nice spread for brunch while we all laugh and catch up with one another.. as the younger kids hunt for their Easter baskets.

I was treated to another lovely meal at my brother and sister in law's home tonight where Katie out did herself yet again.  Katie has an appreciation for elegance and class, and it shows in how she sets and table and serves a meal!!!   As always the food was out of this world - and it's nice to watch my little nephew enjoy his Easter in the same home my brother and I did when my Grandparent's lived there. - Religious traditions aren't the only ones I like to see preserved!

I'm very fortunate to have the family and friends that I do... who make holidays like this so wonderful!

I hope all of you have a wonderful Easter season!!

Eulogy for a Parakeet

This past Wednesday I lost my feathered companion of nearly 10 years.  After miraculously recovering from a near fatal respiratory infection at Christmas, my beloved "killer"-parakeet, Tiki, finally gave up the ghost.

I know there are so many people out there who don't understand a person's attachment to animals.  I ofter struggle with whether or not we even have the right to keep animals in our homes, rather than letting them remain in the wild.  But for those of us who do welcome an animal into our lives, they have a way of touching our hearts forever.

Almost 10 years ago my younger sister insisted on getting a parakeet.  A friend of hers was working for a woman who bred birds and hand raised them... allowing them to be much more social than a bird who has spent it's youth only with other birds.  My mother was absolutely opposed to the idea... I on the other hand fought the case for my sister.  After all, when I was in middle school I had pets of my own (a mouse and later a hamster).  I thought it would be good for my sister, and naturally I wouldn't mind helping out where I could.

After wearing down Mom's resistance, we finally went and picked out a bird.  Kristy settled on a beautiful blue parakeet - and we gave it the name "Tiki" after the Disney World attraction, "The Enchanted Tiki Room"... the place where loads of animatronic birds sing and dance.

Initially we thought Tiki was a male.  It was actually suggested to us that we get her (thinking she was a male) because male parakeets can learn to talk and also tend to have a more mild demeanor.  For years, Tiki fooled us.... though we should have guessed her true gender when she would boldly bite our late golden retriever's nose any time he stuck it in her cage, and would ride fearlessly on his back throughout the house --- and drew blood from my father on numerous occasions -- learning that once you teach a bird something (he taught her to bite) it's hard to UN-TEACH it.

It wasn't until we started bird-sitting for a neighbor's parakeet that we discovered Tiki's true nature.  When put in the same room as a male, Tiki's biological alarm clock went off and she became an egg laying factory for years to come.  "Tiki-man" as we had called the bird became "Tiki-woman".  I thought her first egg was hysterical.. my sister thought it was disgusting.

As my mother had envisioned, the novelty of having a bird quickly wore off for my sister, so Tiki became my sole responsibility -- though she remained in my sister's bedroom for most of her life.  Not being afraid of the little blue powder puff's temper tantrums, I had no qualms about her being out of her cage.  We quickly bonded - a type of bond I didn't know birds were capable of.  She knew the sound of my footsteps - even the sound of my car.  She would be mostly silent for the majority of the day, and then hear my car pull up or my footsteps coming through the front door and she would start chirping up a storm.

In the early years when she could fly, her and I loved to play tag.  She'd sit on the roof of her cage and I'd take off down the hall way -- and she'd come zooming after me.  Of course we couldn't do this when Mom was around... as the very sight of Tiki outside the confines of her cage caused my mother to go into cardiac arrest.

Tiki's fierceness and bold nature earned her the nickname of "killer parakeet".  Though she did have a very sweet and gentle side, I learned on a few occasions not to cross her.  Once, while she was sitting on her cage roof gazing at herself in the mirror, I tried to give her a kiss on the back.  When I held her, she was fine with getting kissed and pet.. but once she was perched on her house.. she wanted to be left alone.  As I would lean in, she'd turn around and peck at me -- I'd try again.. and again, she'd whip around and peck.  Finally, with a slight laugh, I leaned in and kissed her... she whipped around like a shot.. and grabbed my nose with her beak... just enough to make it bleed on and off all night.  She taught me that when a bird says "no", she means it!

There are so many stories I could share about her, but there isn't enough memory on my hard-drive to contain them all.  She kept me laughing on a constant basis... especially on days when nothing else in the world seemed to make me smile.  Some of my fondest memories are just the two of us laying down, her nuzzled against my cheek... cooing her little heart out.

Her last day or so seemed to be rough on her.  We're not quite sure what happened -- perhaps it was a burst of energy that people say we get before we die -- perhaps it was something else... but she was going crazy the day before she passed away.  She would climb all over her cage trying to get out, and would keep falling from her perches, but would spring right back up and try again.  We knew something was wrong.  I'd take her out periodically and sit with her, and that would calm her down for a bit.

I couldn't sleep that night thinking of her, and around 12:30am I decided to check on her.  I lifted the towel over her cage and saw her sleeping on the floor.. when she saw me she darted up and again attempted to climb the walls of the cage, signaling she wanted out.  I took her out and over to the couch where we lay together for a while.  She was restless, but eventually settled near my cheek.. pulling gently on the whiskers of my goatee every now and then when I would move my head to glance in her direction.  I gave her a kiss on the back and returned her to her cage for her to sleep.

I dreaded waking up in the morning.  I knew that if she had survived the night I would have to contact the vet to have her put to sleep.  Her increased weakened state and inability to keep herself on a perch was a clear sign the tumor she had developed was finally taking it's toll... or her heart was simply too weak to carry on. 

I finally got out of bed around 11:30am.. thinking that if something had happened, my parents would have surely woken me up sooner.  As I went up the stairs, I noticed no one was home: Dad was on his walk and mom had gone to a doctor appointment.  As I turned to go into the kitchen, I noticed the towel was taken off her cage, and expected to see her napping on the bottom.  Sadly, I found she had passed... her little heart finally gave up after both my parents had left the house.

After taking a few minutes to compose myself I quietly laid her to rest in the garden in our back yard.  The rain that was falling seemed to echo the tears that were welling up in my eyes as I laid my "baby bird" in the ground.  The gift that God had graced me with for so long had now been returned to Him.

Theologians have argued for centuries whether or not animals have souls - and thus go to Heaven.  I'm not God.. nor a theologian, but after having the companionship of a dog for 13 years and a bird for nearly 10, I have come to the conclusion that they certainly do.  The way they bond with people, the insight into our souls that they seem to have tells me that there is more to them than just what we see on the outside.  It is my belief that God gives us these companions to remind man how to love unconditionally.. something we seem to forget often. 

The house is a very different place without Tiki... no chirps or squeaks... or squawks... radiating through the house.  That simple yet beautiful presence is now gone, and we all feel it.  I am consoled by a saying a friend told me when my dog passed away, and it can be modified for any animal who has touched our hearts: "Heaven would not heaven be, without my bird to welcome me."

Thanks for 10 years of companionship and love, Tiki-woman!  Fly free!

Lent

"Remember Man that thou art dust and to dust thou shalt return."

Ash Wednesday marks the start of the Lenten season... a time of penance, fasting and atonement for our sins.  We make small sacrifices throughout these 40 days to remind ourselves of the ultimate sacrifice Our Lord made of Himself on the cross.


I shall refrain from my usual rambling about the history of various Lenten practices.  If you miss these tidbits of information, you are welcome to view last year's Ash Wednesday post.

I'm always grumbling about how lazy Catholics have become.  Many only do what they feel they "have" to... just going through the motions and not putting any real effort or thought into what they are doing.  We've become obsessed with ourselves and concern only on what we "get out of it".  Faith isn't like that.  Our practices, customs and Mass are supposed to be about worshiping and glorifying God -- not making it "all about me".  If you're not "getting anything out of it", maybe you're not putting anything into it!

I did over hear a conversation recently that really made me laugh, and perfectly summed up the whole idea behind Lent. This conversation was between two women: "Ugh, Lent is almost here isn't it?" - "Yea, Ash Wednesday is this week."  - "I hate Lent.  What a pain in the ass." - "Oh yea... Jesus fasted and wandered the desert, stayed up all night alone in the garden, was beaten up and crucified for you.  And you have to give up meat on Friday, fast a little and maybe give up something extra for a few weeks.  Yea.. you poor baby."

That woman made my day! :-)

I found this above image while browsing the internet.  The author wanted to remind people that Lent isn't just about giving something up for 40 days (ie: chocolate), but it's for giving ourselves up to God everyday, and remembering all His human body had to endure.. giving our frail bodies the inspiration to keep going!

Letter to New York State

Dear New York State,

For over 10 years now I have had to work hard, pay my taxes and abide by the laws of the state.  I continue to work hard at a poor paying retail job while living with my parents all so I do not have to bother you for welfare and financial assistance.

When I was in school I was told to work hard, go to college and apply myself.  I was promised a world of opportunity would be opened to me.  I did just that.  I went to work out of High School to help pay for books and college tuition.  I started at a local Community College and eventually transferred to a University in the SUNY school system where I successfully earned a BA in History and a Master's in Education.

I still have yet to see the world of opportunity I was promised.  Instead, I still find myself making below the poverty line with no possibility for jobs in the field of education.  I read in the newspaper regularly about more budget cuts, teacher layoffs, school closings and district restructuring.  I along with many other competent and NYS certified teachers sit on the side lines while the doors of employment stay closed to us.

Like many of my classmates, I sought work as a substitute teacher looking to get my foot in the door.  What I have found is that the only door I can manage to get my foot into is the "exit".  Should I be fortunate enough to stumble across a district that may have a potential opening in my field, I become one of thousands of applicants for that one opening... usually to find that the job was eliminated all together for lack of funding.

As I work my retail job day after day, contemplating the vast amount of money I paid to attend New York State schools, and become New York State certified, and all the hoops I jumped through to meet the high teaching standards of New York State, I also get to work with the products of your school system.  The same school system that you are constantly making budget cuts to and from which you are eliminating staffing.

The educational budget cuts being made in this state and across the country have indeed trickled down to my job... where all day I have to take customers by the hand to help them do simple tasks in a store which they cannot seem to figure out on their own.  Young people can no longer follow directions, speak or write proper English or adequately comprehend what they read.

I can't help but wonder: if so many people like myself, who worked hard for an education and to be as independent as possible (resisting public assistance) can not find work, then what will become of this new "breed" of adult that our public school systems are producing?  Without the qualified staff, small classrooms, extracurricular programs and support staff in place in our schools, you are creating a new generation of adults who have been used to getting "pushed through" the system, lacking many of the basic tools it takes to survive in the world, and expect them to become contributing members of society?

You may be saving money in the short term, but I hate to think of the money you will be paying out in the very near future when these countless students walk out into the world as adults unable to stand on their own two feet.  I wonder how many of them will even be able to spell, "unemployment".

Salmagundi!

Few things in life make me feel happier than a new hat.  Every season I think I have all the hats I possibly need... but then... I see it... another hat I simply cannot live without!!!  My porkpies are after all my signature piece!  I can't ever say no to one!

I wonder if there is a Betty Ford type clinic for people like me?

Maybe I am somehow related to Lucy Ricardo who could never pass up that new hat in the hat store window.

Speaking of hat stores.. I stumbled across a store in Boston last summer when I was tracking down a Panama straw diamond porkpie from Bigalli hats.  The company gave me a list of their American distributors to try and find the particular hat style I was looking for.

The last store on the list was Salmagundi.  They didn't have an online store (though, much to my great excitement, they appear to be creating one!), but I figured I had nothing to lose... so I sent my message off to cyber space oblivion and hoped for the best.

Literally within minutes, I got a reply from one of the shop owners, Jessen.  Do you know how often I have contacted companies and stores and don't get a response for days???  This was a good omen.

Sure enough, Salmagundi had the illusive hat in stock!  Jessen even did his best to find me a hat that would best compliment the shape of my head (long oval for those of you hat freaks who are "in the know" for hat termonology).  Granted, these hats come in sizes S - M - L - XL, but sometimes the shape does have a tendency to differ from hat to hat.

I gladly placed the order and in record timing, found the hip little Salmagundi hat box on my front porch containing my amazing new summer hat -- which was indeed a perfect fit!

Part of me wants to open up a hat store here in Buffalo, but knowing little about business... and also knowing there would probably be little demand in this area for one, it will remain a pipe dream.  But honestly, part of me wants to ditch the effort to look for the even more illusive teaching job, move to Boston, and work for Jessen and his crew!

Feel free to check out their blog that I have linked above.  You'll see they have much more than just hats.. though the hats are reason enough for me to love them!  If you're in Boston, stop by and see them in person -- or, if you're like me, you can wait eagerly for their online website to open.  :)

Things that go for walks in the night.

I will never ever join a gym.  Ever.  My form of exercise has always been going for walks.  It helped me years ago drop from 305 pounds and a 52 waist down to 180.  Now that my weight has ballooned back up, I have decided to get walking again.

I'm not a fan of walking during the day.  I'm a night owl by nature and sunburn passing a window... so I generally get the urge to wander about after dark.  This is ironic since I was afraid of the dark as a kid.  Now, it's common for me to be strolling around my neighborhood at 10 or 11pm.

Tonight, I ventured out into the cold night air around 10... I love winter walks provided the ice isn't bad.  I do so much better in the colder temps, and can walk longer.  The only problem I seem to have is that my back (I have lower back problems) tenses up more in the winter temperatures.. causing me to rely on my walking stick a bit more than I do in the warmer months.

I got a few blocks from my house.. lost in thought.. minding my own business, when I see a strange black figure walking towards me on the opposite side of the street... carrying a lantern of sorts... and a walking a little dog.  It scared the hell out of me..  at first, it looked like the Grim Reaper was taking Toto for a walk!  Gripping my walking stick tighter.. ready to beat the be-jebus out "death" should "it" decide to cross the street.. I kept staring at this thing walking parallel to me.

As I got closer... from my side of the street mind you... I noticed it was a person (a woman from the sound of the voice talking to the dog), wearing the most bizarre long coat I have ever seen.  Even the cuffs of the sleeves hung down in a flowing manner.. just like you'd expect to see on a Grim Reaper costume... it even looked like the coat had a hood!  The "lantern" it looked like she was holding turned out to be an LED head-band flashlight that hikers use so they can free their hands for climbing.  What an odd outfit to be wearing to walk one's dog!  And here I thought wearing pajama pants and slippers to go shopping was messed up.

I live in a rather quiet and safe suburb north of Buffalo... had I been in the city proper I would not have been all that surprised...but not in my area.  Here, the only thing I generally come across are people in those annoying matching velour track suits... with the matching headband of course.  But death?  Nope.. never expected to run into him... err... her out for a stroll.

Christmas is coming....

I can't believe how quickly time is going.  Today is already the fourth Sunday of Advent.. so light the third purple candle.. the final candle on the Advent wreath.

Though I've had my Christmas decorations up for a while, I have not been in the Christmas spirit.  Working retail one is bombarded with negative people.. yelling and fighting over items being in stock, their orders not in on time, etc.  I come home exhausted and find myself waiting for the season to be over.

This is not to say I'm anti-Christmas.  On the contrary.. I am very much looking forward to the celebration of Christmas morning Mass... the ringing of the bells at the return of the Gloria being sung once again.  I'm just over the whole commercial aspect of the holiday.  Trees are great.. gifts are great.. but when people forget the humble origins of Christmas, the holiday becomes nothing more than an excuse to go into debt.

I have included a picture of my modest Christmas tree.  I didn't have the desire or energy to drag out my usual artificial tree (real trees are too expensive for me) -- assemble it, decorate it.. and eventually pack the whole thing up.  I went out in search of an easy tree.

I found the perfect "Charlie Brown" tree at a local nursery.  I always loved the sparse trees that no one else could possible love.  So when I saw this 5 1/2 odd ball, I had to take it home.  The sales lady was a bit surprised... she had no idea what someone would do with such a tree.

Once decorated, like Charlie Brown's little tree.. it looks quite nice.  I love how the ornaments really stand out.. and believe it or not, it holds ALL the ornaments I put on my fat 7ft tree. - AND, it only take two minutes to assemble and disassemble.  No fuss tree!

For those who are fans of Victorian style Christmases, you will recognize this tree as a "feather tree".. the first style of artificial trees available.. originally made out of goose feathers on wooden dowels. Other people though may think of the line from the famous "Christmas Story" movie:  "It looks like it was made of... green pipe cleaner!".  My favorite comment came from my godson Gavin, who when seeing the picture of facebook said it looks like a twig.  So there it is, my Christmas "twig".

You may note the nativity set - it belonged to my Grandparents.  They purchased it their first Christmas together back in 1953, and it was under their tree ever since.  I am a strict believer though that baby Jesus does not get put into the crib until Christmas morning.  In a time when Christmas decorations go up in November, I think it's important to remember that the real joy of Christmas comes when we mark the birth of the Word made Flesh.

While I try to keep up with my baking and finish my shopping.. I wish you all a very Merry Christmas -- and want you to remember that despite the glitz and glamour this holiday may offer... it all started with a poor child born in a stable... laid to rest where animals feed.  "Keep Christ in Christmas!"  :)